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success

You are not your past!

By Mindset and ConfidenceNo Comments

I want to tell you something important, YOU ARE NOT YOUR PAST!

Events and experiences from our past have got to to where we are, but that should be their only role.

Why do I say this?

Because your future is not yet written, it is yet to be created and guess what, YOU ARE THE CREATOR!!!

That’s right, you have control over where you go and what you do in your future.

So why would you want the shitty experiences from your past to be the mould that shapes your future?

Nobody wants that!

But we do this all the time!

It’s time to take back control over your destiny. You are more than capable of doing it and I can help you.

I’ve been there, it was one of the themes in my life for many years but I did the inner work, did the mindset shifts and left that behind me.

In my DD Power Hour XL coaching call you have 90 minutes of YOU time where we can work through 1-2 areas that are holding you back. It may be confidence, past experiences affecting current mindset, whatever mindset issue it is, we can work through it to get you unstuck and moving forward again.

It’s like the breakdown service who come out and fix your car so you can continue on to your destination. We do that for YOU.

Book your DD Power Hour XL call HERE, it’ll be great to help you.

Are You Scared Of Success?

By Mindset and ConfidenceNo Comments

I’m going to get you really thinking with this post.

When we procrastinate, doubt ourselves and hold ourselves back, it may not be a fear of failing that causes us to do these things, it could actually be a fear of succeeding!

Think about it, what happens when you begin to succeed? You get thrust into the spotlight, all eyes start being on you and you start being the centre of attention.

The results of being successful can be scary!

Ask yourself something. Are you scared of fucking up?

Now think about not messing up but doing the opposite, you do everything right and Mr Success comes to visit. 

This happened to me back in my archery days. While I was working towards being a champion archer, nobody really noticed me, I was in the shadows and could just carry on doing my thing.

Then the British championships happened and my first attempt saw me coming second and getting the silver medal. People noticed me, people watched me, people suddenly started to monitor everything I did, whether it was my work ethic when practising or what I was achieving in the single-day tournaments.

Then the first gold medal happened, the national records happened and everything was amplified. There was archery media attention at tournaments, every shot was watched and analysed on the Thursday and Friday evenings at local clubs.

BUT…..

This wasn’t an overnight thing, the more things you do right, the more attention you get but it’s a slow-burn and usually at a pace you can get used to.

One of the big worries is that people are going to go from obscure to fame in the time it takes to have a good night sleep, but it’s not like that.

I promise you, the journey of success is easier and smoother than you think.

Our mind creates this big thing about it, turns cute little kittens into wild tigers, a tiny puddle into a deep lake and a speed ramp into a whole mountain. The reality is much nicer and easier to swallow.

I can help you on this journey to success, help you navigate the worries and the fears and help you celebrate when you make it.

Book a call with me HERE. A quick 30 minute free call will help identify where you want to go and how we can work together.

The day I was told to know my place

By Mindset and ConfidenceOne Comment

The day I was told “Know your place”

Back when I worked in my 9-5 job, in the final couple of years I was there I had a new manager. Nice guy away from work but when in work he had a very old style of managing, kind of “shut up and do what I say” style.

One day during a summer holiday, I was up a ladder doing maintenance on projectors. It was an awkward position to be in and my manager enters the room and tells me to do something. Obviously I had to refuse, I had a projector in my hands that I’d just removed from the ceiling bracket. What he said next helped me decide to start putting things into place to work for myself. He told me “Know your place and just do it!”.

Initially I felt horrible, I felt small and I almost complied, but I started to remember who I truly was and my worth. I questioned what he said and he repeated it once more. It was then that I vowed to get out of there, I was worth SO much more than that!

From that point on, our relationship wasn’t the best, and when a new headteacher arrived and decided to create mass redundancies (also resulting in as many more leaving), my name included, it was the best news ever!

I took that redundancy to launch my coaching business on MY terms, knowing my true value and not being surrounded by politics and egos.

My final day there was at the end of the summer holiday so there was virtually nobody to say goodbye to. It was a day of two emotions, sadness for not being able to say goodbye to friends, but excitement to be getting out of such a toxic environment and into MY world.

This was a huge lesson for me to never let anyone put me down like that. I’m worth more and you know what, SO ARE YOU!!!

It’s horrible when I’m told by clients how they are being put down and made to feel second class. NOBODY should feel that way and that’s why I do what I do.

It breaks my heart seeing people not living their true life, not being themselves and not being able to be themselves. I’ve felt that in the past and I hate the thought of someone else going through that, I use the word “hate” very very rarely!

Please please remember that you are worthy, you are amazing, you are unique.

You are worthy of love, worthy of success and you CAN have the life you desire.

Daz

My top 3 Ways to hit your goals

By Personal DevelopmentNo Comments

So, you’ve decided what your goals are for this year but will you hit your goals? How far along that road to them are you?

Are you still thinking “It’s ok, I’ve got plenty of time to do them”?

Will you still be thinking the same in 6 months time?

Let’s help you get closer to achieving your goals shall we with 3 tips to get you there.

1 – Write your goals down

Keeping them in your head means they are simply dreams. Writing them down though puts them into reality and helps you hit your goals.

Writing down your goals also activates processes in your brain which vastly improves the chance of your achieving them.

 

2 – Tell someone about them

Telling people what your goals are, gives you accountability. If you tell no-one there will be nobody to keep you on track and you won’t be pushed psychologically. When you tell someone, tell a group or even announce them on social media so you have THOUSANDS of people who know what you’re meant to be achieving, it gives you a huge push to get things done, otherwise, you dread people asking “Have you done them yet?”.

Again, this is another weapon against procrastination and helps you to hit your goals.

 

3 – Use a task manager/todo app with deadlines and reminders

Keeping your goals on paper is great but it relies on you reviewing them on a regular basis and seeing where you are. A better option is to use a task manager app such as Todoist, Omnifocus or Microsoft Todo where you can set deadlines and reminders. The reminders will trigger an alarm on your phone, tablet or computer to tell you that a task needs to be done.

Without this, unless you have an absolutely rock-solid process in place, you will begin to miss deadlines, forget to review your task and project list and ultimately fail to achieve your goals.

Want more tips like these to help you live your best life? Come join my free group The Performance Lounge –
https://www.facebook.com/groups/performancelounge

 

5 Ways to feel good each day

By Personal DevelopmentNo Comments

You know those days when you just feel “Meh”? You really want to feel happier and more energetic but not sure what you can do to make that happen.

Worry not, I’m here to give you 5 tips to banish the ‘Meh’ monsters and feel happier.

1: Be polite, it makes you feel good!

We can go through our day filled with our own thoughts and ignoring other people but that’s like living in a steel box, we don’t have the connection and interaction that we, as humans, crave and need.

When we begin to be more aware of the people around us, be polite with them, and receive the same back, it lifts our hearts and helps us feel happier each day.

2: Smile at people, it makes them feel good!

Did you know that smiling releases neuropeptides in your brain? Do you even know what neuropeptides do? Well, let me tell you, these little fellas help you fight off stress.

When you smile you also release the happy hormones in your brain, Dopamine and Seratonin, that help you feel much happier.

So smile, smile at someone in the street as you catch each other’s eyes, smile at work colleagues and friends. Trust me, you’ll feel much better!

3: Random acts of kindness, it makes everyone feel good!

Think about how you feel when a stranger holds the door open for you or stops and lets you out when you’re driving. Feels good doesn’t it. You know what, doing them for others feels just as good!

It can be holding a door open for someone, picking something up that has been dropped, or being there for someone if they’re upset. Any of these acts of kindness not only makes the person receiving them feel good, but they help you feel good too.

So what could you do today?

 

4: Tell yourself today is going to be a fabulous day

This is in the form of affirmations. I’ve written about affirmations before and with good reason, they work. Doing affirmations each day can, over time, actually re-wire your brain to be naturally happier.

Examples of affirmations are:
Today is going to be an amazing day!
I choose to be happy today.
I am confident and strong.

Try them morning and night, you’ll start to see changes in your day.

5: Stop reading the news.

There’s no hiding from the fact that the media thrives on shock, fear, scandal, and making you feel inadequate, it’s their bread and butter work, but it’s not good for you!

Look at the tv, internet, newspaper, wherever you get your daily dose of news from, and just look at how many stories are negative. I would actually say it’s 60% and above, and a mixture of war, violence, how amazing a celeb looks (and implying that you don’t) and many more stories like that.

Remember, you are what you surround yourself with, so if you surround yourself with crap by consuming all that negative media, you are going to feel like crap.

It’s time to do a news detox!

3 Ways to boost your self-esteem

By Personal DevelopmentOne Comment

Imagine going through life thinking you’re worthless, thinking you just aren’t good enough. It’s such a horrible thought but many of us do just that to one level or another.

Maxwell Maltz said:
“Low self-esteem is like driving through life with the hand brake on”
And this is exactly what it’s like.

When your self-esteem isn’t as high as I could be, you hold yourself back in life because you simply don’t think you’re good enough.

Let’s have a look at 3 ways in which you can begin to build your self-esteem and take that hand brake off.

1: Mind your language!

When we find our self-esteem to be low, we can find ourselves using quite negative language about ourselves.

“Oh I’m just not good enough”

“I know people say I’m a great person but just look at me”

“I’d love to do that but I’m crap at it”

Any of those statements ring any bells?

The common thread throughout theme is the negative language used towards yourself. You tell yourself you’re not good enough, you’re not a great person and you’re terrible at something. Ask yourself, would you talk to your best friend like that? Of course not, then why talk to yourself that way!

Start becoming aware of your language and consciously catch yourself and change it. So next time you hear yourself saying something like “I’m so crap at this”, change it to “I don’t know how to do this yet but I’m willing to learn”, or maybe using “yet” at the end of a statement such as “I’m not great at this YET”.

When you start consciously changing the language you use every day, it can improve your self-esteem. It’s not going to be easy but isn’t the effort worth it!

2: Affirm yourself.

I love using affirmations! When you start using affirmations every day, they can actually start re-wiring your brain! This is called neuroplasticity and it’s the ability to re-wire the neurones in the brain.

Your sub-conscious is amazing but it’s also a little dumb. You see, it believes whatever you keep telling it. Think of those times when you are telling yourself that you’re miserable, you find yourself getting more and more miserable don’t you. That’s because your sub-conscious is believing that constant stream of “facts” and so you become that. Flip that though and keep telling yourself positive things such as “I’m confident and powerful” or “I can achieve anything I put my mind to”. Keep repeating statements like that to yourself and you begin to absolutely believe it.

This is like in health coaching, the way to change your diet isn’t to say to yourself “I can never eat those foods again”, that’s never going to work, but if you begin to crowd out the bad with the good foods, pile the veggies on your plate so they naturally crowd out the crap, you will achieve those lifestyle changes.

The same principle is used with affirmations. You’re not saying “I can’t have those thoughts” because what will happen there is you will definitely have those thoughts, it’s human nature. What you’re doing is crowding out the negative thoughts by bringing in the positive ones. Over time the positive will push the negative out almost completely.

3: Visualise yourself as a super hero!

Just like affirmations, visualisation can help you tremendously with low self-esteem.

You watch movies, you see the powerful superhero’s being able to show strength and save the planet, now it’s time for you to be one too!

Find somewhere quiet, close your eyes, and see yourself putting on a costume that signified power and confidence to you. You may be Superman, Wonder Woman, or maybe a warrior, something that to you, signifies power. Once you see yourself in that costume, think of the traits that character has and begin to FEEL those traits and powers being transferred over to you. You are starting to absorb the strength and confidence of that character.

This may seem weird or silly at first but give it a chance, see if you feel the difference. You need to have an open mind and heart to allow this to begin changing your self-esteem.

Your visualisation may actually be you, in power clothes, pair of Ray-Ban shades, walking down the street with absolute confidence. You visualise whatever you need to visualise, so long as you completely feel that confidence and power.

Stay in that costume, let the power lift your heart, mind, confidence and esteem up and up and up.

Try these, let me know in the comments how they help.

Step outside your comfort zone every day

By Personal DevelopmentNo Comments

Our comfort zone, it keeps us safe, warm, comfortable and snuggly. It also keeps us stagnant, scared and weak.

Our comfort zone is brilliant at keeping us safe and protected, it’s like a fluffy blanket that’s been wrapped around us and we never want it to be removed. We all love it, we all love that feeling of safety, but behind all of the fluffy warmth lurks a dark secret.

Our lovely warm, fluffy comfort zone covered in unicorns actually contains evil monsters called procrastination, weakness and stagnation. These are monsters that we really don’t want in our lives and the only way to escape from them is to step out of our warm comfort zone.

Stepping out of the zone doesn’t mean you’re stepping into the unknown, the darkness or the pit of doom, quite the opposite in fact. Stepping out of your comfort zone actually means stepping into a world full of sunshine, beautiful fields and actual Unicorns. A world I call the Growth Zone.

It’s called the Growth Zone because it’s the place where you grow. Your confidence grows, your skills grow and you grow as a person. There’s no secret path to this place of growth but it DOES take effort to make that step out of your comfort zone.

Stepping into the growth zone, even if it’s just dipping your toe into it each day, can make huge differences to you, to your life, your career and your business.

It DOES require effort from you but the very act of doing something each day that makes you think “oh crap!” can change you in so many wonderful ways.

Make connections, go to the cinema on your own, say hi to a stranger, anything like this that makes you feel uncomfortable will help you grow your comfort zone so what was once scary, then becomes natural.

Every time you enter that growth zone, your comfort zone expands to incorporate that new growth. Look at the people who do a skydive, initially they are SO scared but most, when they get back on the ground, would happily do it all again. Their comfort zone has expanded and embraced what they’ve just done. This applies to everything we do in life.

So get out there, escape that comfort zone and enjoy your time in the growth zone.